Being able to shift our perspective towards a more positive bend is helpful. This shift serves a functional purpose to keep us moving forward. This is helpful, of course, but we should also not be shaming all the “not so good feelings” we’re experiencing right now. Sadness, panic, fear, hopelessness and grief are all appropriate responses to what’s happening.

But, sometimes we need a mental break from those feelings. We need some other perspectives to keep us going. Here are 8 affirmations I’ve been spending time with over the past few weeks. I hope you find them helpful.

This is not normal and it’s OK that I’m not acting normal.

Try not to internalize the gaslighting that’s happening on the news. This is an unprecedented global issue and trying to be ‘normal’ is an unreasonable expectation right now. Plus, normal has always been overrated.

I am doing the best I can.

We can only do what we can right now. Maybe that means being productive, maybe it doesn’t. All that actually matters is that you’re trying your best.

Creating helps me feel in control.

When so much of our lives feels out of control and uncertain, taking control and creating anything: an experience, playlist or puzzle, can be grounding.

I don’t have to feel guilty for having the resources I do have.

It’s OK to have enough resources to be OK during this time. If you have more than you need, consider how you might help support others if you want – whether that’s emotionally or financially. Either way, having right now doesn’t mean that you can’t feel good about how fortunate you are.

It’s OK for me to experience joy and other positive emotions during this time.

There is no one right way to feel during a pandemic. Relish the moments of joy and ease that you do have. You’re allowed to feel good and hopeful.

There is no right way to survive the pandemic.

We’re all doing the best we can to survive. This may not look like your normal way of being and that’s OK. Extend yourself the grace of flexibility and adaptability.

Taking care of myself helps me better take care of others.

Running yourself into the ground and taking nonessential risks is not helpful to your wellbeing. Taking care of yourself allows you to be more present for others.

Being productive is not a sign of personal worth.

It’s OK if you don’t have the capacity to work extra hard, start a new business or learn a new language. Productivity was never an indicator of worth and still shouldn’t be.

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In our latest episode Rachel and Jor-El take on this listener submitted question on how to get started in therapy. They cover everything from how to search for a therapist and how to know if you’ve got the right fit for you.  Therapy is confusing and can be difficult too. We hope this episode provides some clarity and inspiration for you to get started.

And if you’re in NY state and interested in working with a member of the Viva Wellness team, hit up the New Clients page. Thank you for listening and please feel free to reach out to us on Instagram and Twitter @vivawellnessnyc.  Also please leave a rating and review on iTunes.

Take a listen below!

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Sometimes the clients who are struggling to get things done (like daily tasks, etc.) struggle because of physical or mental health issues like depression. Other times, not delivering on those tasks isn’t just about being lazy, but more so about not adequately addressing the issues at the heart of the matter.

Do you actually need rest?

This is one question that I often ask people who are struggling to do more. I live in one of the busiest cities in the world. It’s literally nicknamed the “city that never sleeps,” and for good reason. There’s always something going on in NYC. There’s a palpable energy that says you should and can DO MORE.

However, this isn’t unique to NYC.

This perspective unfortunately means that we can never be doing enough. And, as a result, we’re always feeling like we’re failing to do something. We’re failing to work on the project, answer those emails or handle those household tasks.

But, how often do you actually pause and ask yourself, “Do I actually just need more rest?”

We are humans with a finite amount of energy. Our lifestyle (work environment, nutrition, exercise) and mental health all impact our energy levels. Before you get to blaming yourself for being lazy take a honest look at yourself and ask two questions:

• Am I getting enough rest?
• Am I getting enough QUALITY rest?

Leave shame behind and work on problem solving.

Before you get to putting yourself down take a step back and look at the barriers in your way of doing whatever is on your list.

If it’s not about feeling tired, what else could it be? Do you have the time that you actually need to complete the task? Are there more materials that you have yet to acquire?

Maybe there are more steps before you get to the actual task. Address those barriers first then dive back in. Otherwise, you may be trying to force a situation and making it more difficult than it actually needs to be.

There are always plenty of things to do. Shaming yourself and calling yourself lazy rarely helps. In fact, I don’t think I’ve heard of a case of it working yet. To move forward with your to do list keep these two tips in mind and see how your process changes for the better.

The post Maybe you’re not lazy. You need solutions. appeared first on .

In our latest episode Jor-El and Rachel talk about one of the most common conditions this time of year, Seasonal Affective Disorder. This depressive condition affects about 10 million US adults. That’s a lot of people! Learn what the signs of SAD are and what steps you can take to make life better if you’re dealing with symptoms.

You may also want to check out our related podcast episode Anxiety and Depression: Myths & Misconceptions.

ANNOUNCEMENT! Do you want to have your question answered on the podcast? Submit your question directly to [email protected] and your anonymous inquiry may be featured on an upcoming episode!

And please leave a rating and review on iTunes so that we can grow our podcast even further. Thanks for listening!

The post Episode 27 of The Viva Wellness Podcast is LIVE! appeared first on .

When someone we love or care about is hurting, it can be difficult to continue to be a source of support. While we may want to continue to offer what we can to help them feel better, it can be tough to continuously provide support, and not only because we have a finite amount of energy. You might also be experiencing the effects of emotional contagion.

Essentially, you’re catching the feelings that you’re friend is experiencing.

While emotional contagion hasn’t quite hit mainstream, it’s something that researchers are studying more, especially as we live in the age of social media where information, and moods, spread quickly.

Emotional contagion, researchers think, is actually an adaptive skill. If we can understand and empathize with those closest to us we secure the bonds of attachment and keep the unit together and on the same page. Unfortunately, we may find that we absorb the others’ emotions as well – even before we actually know it. We may find ourselves picking up on subtle behavioral cues in the person and even mimicking those cues and behaviors ourselves subconsciously. In essence, we can “catch” their feelings!

If someone in our life is feeling depressed, or otherwise having a hard time, we may find ourselves quickly feeling similarly, especially if we’re close to that person (that’s the evolutionary bonding at work). We absorb so much intense emotion that we then need to protect ourselves (counter-contagion).

I was recently reading an article in Psychology Today that talked about the idea of emotional contagion and how it impacts our collective mental health. You should definitely read about the implications for the spread of violence AND sharing positivity (it’s not all bleak news!).

It got me thinking about conversations I’ve had with friends and clients about the tendency we have sometimes to distance ourselves from negative energy.

Emotional contagion means that we, without even noticing it, absorb the emotions of those around us (even if those emotions aren’t explicitly said). This might explain why you find yourself pulling back from the friend whose having a hard time despite you wanting to support them. Simply put, we don’t like feeling bad. We might even forego quality time with someone we care about, especially if we often leave their presence feeling drained (counter-contagion).

How do we work through emotional contagion?

My argument isn’t that we should just accept contagion (and counter-contagion) as is and forego compassion for others completely, but I think this natural principle means that we can do our own personal work by checking in with ourselves often so that we may address the issue at hand, provide active support when needed and keep moving forward in our connections more healthily.

If you find yourself always feeling down around someone, maybe it’s time to use that knowledge to check in with them and see how you might be able to offer support differently. Chances are acknowledging that you’ve noticed will communicate how much you care and that can go a long way for someone who’s battling with something internally. And of course, you paying more attention to your own feelings also offers you the opportunity to get your needs and desires met as well.

The post The Real Reason You’re Avoiding Your Depressed Friend appeared first on .

Take a listen and enjoy! As always, if you’re feeling like something might be off, it might be a good idea to talk to a therapist for support and treatment tailored to you.

Don’t forget to tweet or DM us your questions and feedback. You can reach us at @vivawellnessnyc, @rachelgersten and @jorelcaraballo on Twitter and Instagram. Don’t forget to leave a rating and review on iTunes!

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We give our thanks to Shanna for sharing with us her background and inspiring story.

Please tweet or DM us your questions and feedback. You can reach us at @vivawellnessnyc, @rachelgersten and @jorelcaraballo on Twitter and Instagram. Don’t forget to leave a rating and review on iTunes!

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The History of Blue Monday

Blue Monday was originally announced in 2005 in a press release by the company called Sky Travel. In the release, the company claimed that it was able to calculate the most depressing day of the year (roughly the third Monday in January) using a number of factors including “time since failing New Year’s resolutions”, the weather, inability to pay debt due to the holidays, etc.  With this declaration, the press release made Blue Monday the unofficial saddest day of the year. It’s…well, just nonsense.

Since its creation many have come to understand the “science” as nothing more than pseudoscience and there’s some thought that the day was contrived to help sell travel tickets and experiences.

What’s the truth?

Honestly, I don’t know if there is some sophisticated formula that makes one day worse than the other. Of course, many of us have our Monday blues as we face each new week.  But, it’s unlikely that the third Monday is January is substantially any different than all the other Mondays on the calendar.

That being said if you are struggling with some Monday blues, here are some things to consider to switch up the energy of the day:

Move Your Body

Most Americans spend way too much time sitting (self included). Something as simple as a quick walk around the block (or around your office building) can do wonders for your emotional health. It might even help enliven you and help you feel more energized. No, seriously! As little as a brisk 10 minute walk can give you a much-needed energy boost and help lift your mood. Taking a small break to move can change the trajectory of the rest of your day.

Hydrate

Taking care of your physical health is a great way to beat the Monday blues. Take in your caffeine by all means, but don’t neglect that your body also just needs plain water. Drinks like coffee and tea are great but they can also be natural diuretics, making you urinate a lot – and potentially feeling de-hydrated. Hydration is one key to keep from feeling sluggish and heavy. Opt for room temperature or fruit water to get an even better boost.

Take Some Breaks & Reconnect

Often times what makes Mondays tough is our desire to plow through work and try to start the week off “right”. Wanting to push through tasks on your to do list is noble (and can be helpful), but it might also lead you to ignore your need for appropriate breaks from work. Be mindful about taking a few 10-15 minute breaks every couple of hours so that you don’t get bogged down in the same place, starting at a screen for hours and hours on end.

Express Yourself

How often have you told yourself to “just get over it” when you’re in a funk? I think a lot of us are guilty of that one. If you’re having a particularly difficult Monday (or any other day) take out a little bit of time to express yourself. Do some reflective journaling. Check in with your therapist. Text or schedule some time to meet up with a friend. A supportive ear is a powerful antidote for so much.

While it’s hard to imagine that any one Monday can be designated as the saddest day of the year, the most important thing to keep in mind is to look out for your mental health and practice those wellness practices just as you would any other day of the year.

The post What is Blue Monday? And is it even real? appeared first on .

A New Way of Telling An Often Unheard Story

Out of the Woods is an incredibly powerful book with an unusual perspective and method of delivery.  It’s a story about a man’s journey with mental health issues. The story follows him throughout stages in his life in which he battles negative thoughts and depression that changes the course of his life. It’s powerful. The story is even more striking as its delivered in a highly detailed graphic novel format.

Even though I was exposed to this book more than a year ago initially, I am still shocked by the authenticity and vulnerability in the story. How often do we get the opportunity to read about men’s experiences with mental health issues? Not often. This is precisely why Out of the Woods is so special. And with its dynamic graphic novel format, the depressive and anxious thoughts come to life in ways that I think hits home with a lot of people.

Out of the Woods is based on a True Story

The story is inspired by the life of its author Brent Williams who faced many challenges in his life. He has dedicated his life to helping support others and showing them that there is light at the end of the proverbial tunnel. His story, represented in this book, shows us that getting help if often complicated and requires battling through guilt, shame and often pride. Williams shows us that getting help isn’t a weakness for any person (or men more specifically), but the path forward to a more fulfilling and peaceful life.

Out of the Woods is a powerful and important book, and in my opinion, long overdue for our conversations on mental health.

You can learn more about Out of the Woods at the website here.

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Why We Use Positive Psychology & Gratitude

The research is clear that positive psychology interventions, such as the GLAD strategy or other gratitude techniques, have been shown to alleviate depressive symptoms.  These kind of practices are not only thought to help the clinically depressed, but also are useful tools in helping the average person feel a bit lighter and positive as well.

The benefits of a gratitude practice are two-fold. The research points to the idea that just practicing the concept of gratitude, like the GLAD technique, will help give you a momentary boost of positivity. The longer game, and I would argue the more influential one, is that as you practice this kind of skill over and over again your brain becomes more attuned and aware of positive things in your life. This enables you to see and acknowledge more positive things as you go about your day. That’s a powerful punch for a strategy that may take a maximum of five minutes to do per day.

But, how does one put this into practice?

How to Use the GLAD Technique

Every once and a while the psychology community comes up with something particularly catchy and the GLAD technique is one of my personal favorite self-care tools. Obviously, its name reinforces its ability to help you improve your mood. It’s also a handy acronym that stands for gratitude, learning, achievement (or accomplishment) and delight. You can do this nightly as a part of your wind-down routine to put you in a better emotional place right before bed.

For example, my GLAD note for the day might looking something like this:

G – I’m grateful for being able to connect with an old friend as sometimes I find it hard to keep up

L- Today I learned a new strategy for helping reduce back strain when I find myself working at my desk for a long time

A- I finally crossed that annoying task off my to-do list

D- I don’t know why, but this morning I stumbled on a quote that really struck me, in a good way, and it totally made my day

A Disclaimer about the GLAD Technique

The GLAD technique is not a cure-all for depression or any other negative emotion. It’s been my experience that for some people it can be difficult to keep up with the daily aspect of this strategy on their own. In and of itself, this strategy is not therapy, but can be one part of a treatment plan. I always recommend connecting with a licensed therapist if you find yourself having a hard time coping with negative emotions.

But, one more thing. We have a gift for you!  Below you’ll find our handy GLAD Recipe that you can save to your mobile device, post to your vision board or wall so that you can remember how to practice the strategy daily.  Enjoy!

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